I had no idea that being a mother would bring such heartbreak, anxiety, fear, sleeplessness, anger, willingness to fight a perfect stranger.....along with so much love, appreciation, compassion, protectiveness, and willingness to give one's own life to protect that of your offspring. If I'd had a 'normal' relationship with my own mother, perhaps I could have prepared myself for at least some of these emotions.
I always saw my friends who'd had kids and thought "there's no way I'm putting myself through that". I could see the utter exhaustion and defeat on their faces, not to mention all that they'd had to sacrifice. But then I had to go and fall in love, and get married. The natural progression was that kids would follow. If I'd known that all that "sacrifice" included stretch marks, cellulite, doubt, loss of brain cells, or turning into my own mother (or atleast, trying NOT to become her), I'm not quite sure I would have taken on this heroic task.
But, alas, here I am....stay-at-home mother of two young children, consumed in their every day lives, shower and privacy deprived...and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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