Destination: White Padded Cell

Okay, so (not that I'm keeping count),.....my toddler, just barely 2, had 8 stage 5 meltdowns in less than 24 hours (and 12 of those 24 hours were spent asleep).

She hates to be clothed.  Hates to be buckled into a car seat.  Hates the stroller.

My 5 year old can't shut up for longer than 30 seconds (and that's being generous).  He has no concept of volume control.  He has never met a stranger he won't carry on a ceaseless conversation with.

Neither of them travel well.  Period.  Or sleep.  Especially out of their own element.

Together, the 3 of us in a room, make each other somewhat homicidal.

So.....what sounds like a great idea??

Packing us all into an airplane for 6 hours with a bunch of strangers!!  And then, just for the added fun, let's throw in a time change from EST to PST, and see how many suicidal thoughts a human being can have!!

I actually start having panic attacks 2 weeks prior to traveling.  Anywhere.  And I'm not talking the self-diagnosed kind.  I mean the kind that actually require medicinal intervention.

(Ugh)

Wasn't there a movie about this??  Or, maybe it was just a nightmare I had.

I'm strongly considering passing out Xanax to everyone in a 5 row vicinity of us. But, then again, misery loves company, right?

(Consider this a favor.  A WARNING.  Do not take ANY United Airlines flight from the east coast to the west coast, anytime in the next 3 weeks.  Trust me.  I'm quite certain even the flight staff will be terrorized for weeks after)

Did I mention this is training for my semi-cross-country-road-trip in June?  With both kids.  And me.  JUST me.

(Double Ugh)

Yes, people.  I own it.  I AM, infact, insane.