Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Operation: Destroy Mom's Sanity

Is in full effect.

And for the record, there's not really that much left at this point.  However, I desperately cling to that tiny portion hidden in the deep corners of my soul.  I covet it.  I nurture it with bubble baths and wine.

But, there is only so much a human being can take before they crack.

I need to preface this story by telling you about the menacing OCD that plagues me.  Daily.  I wipe, clean, dust, mop, pick up, put away and throw away ALL. DAY. LONG.   I can't stand clutter.  I don't like knick-knacks.  And if I haven't used something in 6 months, it's new home is the Salvation Army.

Now, I realize most people aren't familiar with a year-round school calendar.  I wasn't either until I moved to the south.  I grew up in a school system that followed a traditional school year.  The one that was designed back in the days when kids needed to be home during the summers to help their parents work on the family farm.

But, those days are over.  And somebody realized that most parents can't handle their kids being home for 3 consecutive months.  And God bless 'em, I say.

So, here in the south, our little elementary kids go to school all year long.  They have what is called a  "staggered entry" and a system that runs on 4 "Tracks".  Each track is out on 'vacation' at different points in the year.

This mother feels that the year round system is working pretty well for my family.  My kid is "tracked in" school for 2 months.....and just about the time I really start to miss his presence around here.....POOF......he's "tracked out" for 4 weeks.

So......... the first few days go really well.  It's fun to have him home.  Fun to re-connect with him.  He gets to play with his sister.  She actually enjoys his company.

Then............. the psychosis sets in.  They require 'round the clock entertainment.  By ME.

I've now got two kids on totally different schedules, who enjoy completely different things.  One needs a nap, the other wants to go the park.  One wants to fight with light sabers, the other one can barely walk a straight line without falling on her face.  My house becomes a battle zone.  I have no time to clean, or shower, or grocery shop, or eat.  The days are spent yelling, whining, complaining (by all 3 of us), threats of boarding school, and sometimes locking myself in the bathroom for a good cry.

I can't run a simple errand without having a 10 minute debriefing about how they are supposed to handle themselves in public.  And somehow, begging a 2 and 5 year old to help me maintain my mental "wellness", just doesn't have the desired affect I had hoped for.

The toy room looks like a Class 5 Hurricane ransacked it............

My "office"/loft space, which I vowed would not have ANY toys in it when we first moved into our home.....

There is not one square cubic foot of space in my home that doesn't have some kind of toy strewn on it.....

And lest you think my home is the only place where chaos reins,
I present to you, my 2 month old car............

All I need to make my life complete is some yellow caution tape.  And I don't just mean for the house.  I'm going to wear it around myself like a Miss America ribbon.  No joke.


  1. Haha, you poor thing. Find someone reliable to babysit for $10 an hour and go take a 2 hour vacation.


  2. Love it! Love 'em al... Just read ur past 5 posts and was cracking up ... You r living my life about3 years ago ...still,never a dull moment with plenty of blogging material!, glad to connect again.
    Fellow NC blogger-Stephanie from www.southern