Saturday, February 12, 2011

The Hunger Games




I don't know how many of you have read this Trilogy of books, but rumor tells me, they are quite popular. I actually jumped on the bandwagon after seeing several of my friends' reviews on Facebook. However, today's post isn't my own personal review of this book series (although I loved them!). It's more of an analysis of how the book compares to my own life......kill, or be killed.

So, in the book, there are "contestants" (ie. mothers), who are placed in a man-made arena (ie. life) and forced to either "survive", or be killed (ie. raise children). Case in point....

I'm trying to get myself and both kids ready and out the door by 8:45AM. I'm feeling pretty good about how things are progressing. We're down to the wire at 8:30AM. I decide it's a good time for a potty break. My mistake is, thinking I can do this uninterupted. Ha!

Small toddler comes into the bathroom, pushes the stool up to the pedastal sink, and begins jumping up and down, inevitably hitting her chin on the procelain. Fabulous.

Screaming commences. Five year old decides to enter room, where I then begin to yell about privacy protocal, and he exits the room in tears. Now I'm the worst mom ever. I just wanted... to... go... to... the... bathroom

Once everyone has calmed down, injuries are assessed, and nothing seems emergency room worthy. I attempt to put shoes and jacket on 5 year old (he generally resists this procedure), then turn to find toddler has stripped completely naked. It is now 8:45AM. Crap.

I now proceed to get toddler RE-dressed, which turns out be very similar to a UFC cagefight, causing 5 year old to fall over in hysterics. I'm not amused.

Ten minutes later, everyone is once again dressed, shoes and jackets on, diaper bag & purse are in one arm, keys in hand......we are out the door. It is close to 9:00AM. I get everyone buckled into their seat, start the car, get the heat going, and pull out of the driveway. We're a little behind schedule, but I still feel confident we can make up the time.

Two minutes into the drive......

"Mom. Did you bring my backpack??"

"WHY would I have your backpack?? That is your ONE responsibility in the morning, to make sure you have your backpack!"

Back to the house we go.

Long story short, I once again pull into the school parking lot, barely shy of 9:15AM, when school actually starts. One of these days, we will make it there before 9:00AM! With barely 4 months left of school, I am convinced we will make this will happen.

I could go into the events at the end of the school day, 3:45pm, when I pick up my son (by foot), and both children chase each other home, roll around in the mud, push each other into bushes, eat strange looking berries, and then scream through the neighborhood because it's fun to hear their own echoes......but, you get the idea.

It's survival of the fittest around here. I'm just missing my bow and arrow.

2 comments:

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